Few weeks ago I received a job offer to be an instructor for a cake decorating class; I was so excited as it is one of my passions and I was really thinking of accepting. Unfortunately though, after going through the schedules I decided to decline the offer as some of the classes are scheduled on weekends -- no chance in hell will I let work interfere with my weekends! I guess it's not my rezeki so now I am back to doing business from home, which isn't much but at least it works well with me -- kalau rajin buat, kalau malas decline. Heh heh .. apa punya businesswoman lah macam nie :)
So anyway, I have been having a sudden itch to start working again so several weeks ago I started looking for jobs -- but this time I want to do something different from what I used to do and so I started sending my CVs to several companies, just to try out my luck. And few days ago ... jeng jeng jeng ... I received an email from the VP (kenapa lah everytime I send out my CV mesti the VP yang respond?!?) of this one company asking for more details about my professional experience and that he is interested to have a 'chat' about my areas of interest.
Told my husband about it and as expected he wasn't too happy about it but gave his green light anyway; he said that it is up to me but he'd still prefer that I stay at home with the kids. He told me to sleep on it before agreeing to pursue this further as he takmau lah like last time, kerja for few months and then resign pulak kan. So how now brown cow? Dulu bukan main suka nak berenti kerja duduk rumah jaga anak but now that I'm a SAHM, I feel that it is a waste of education and those years of trainings and experience will go down the drain.
Maybe I wasn't born to be a SAHM.
Maybe I was born to take over the world (okay, over exaggerating it, but you know what I mean).
So how now brown cow?
I know that before anything else, my job is as a mother -- to be there for my kids in every step of the way but I cannot make my kids my sole identity. And at the risk of sounding sefish, I feel that I need a life outside of catering my children's whims and fancies in order to keep my sanity.
So how now brown cow?
It's been 2 days and I'm still sleeping on it .....
So anyway, I have been having a sudden itch to start working again so several weeks ago I started looking for jobs -- but this time I want to do something different from what I used to do and so I started sending my CVs to several companies, just to try out my luck. And few days ago ... jeng jeng jeng ... I received an email from the VP (kenapa lah everytime I send out my CV mesti the VP yang respond?!?) of this one company asking for more details about my professional experience and that he is interested to have a 'chat' about my areas of interest.
Told my husband about it and as expected he wasn't too happy about it but gave his green light anyway; he said that it is up to me but he'd still prefer that I stay at home with the kids. He told me to sleep on it before agreeing to pursue this further as he takmau lah like last time, kerja for few months and then resign pulak kan. So how now brown cow? Dulu bukan main suka nak berenti kerja duduk rumah jaga anak but now that I'm a SAHM, I feel that it is a waste of education and those years of trainings and experience will go down the drain.
Maybe I wasn't born to be a SAHM.
Maybe I was born to take over the world (okay, over exaggerating it, but you know what I mean).
So how now brown cow?
I know that before anything else, my job is as a mother -- to be there for my kids in every step of the way but I cannot make my kids my sole identity. And at the risk of sounding sefish, I feel that I need a life outside of catering my children's whims and fancies in order to keep my sanity.
So how now brown cow?
It's been 2 days and I'm still sleeping on it .....
2 comments:
When I finally got pregnant with my son, I just knew that I'd quit my job to be a SAHM. The decision was easy for me as I grew up with my grandmother so my relationship with my own mother is somewhat distant and a little awkward. And I don't trust anyone else to care for him while I'm at work. Thankfully my DH is very supportive of my decision. Although I do feel like it's sort of a waste of education and energy at times, I know deep down I wanted to be there for my children during their early years. I wont be a SAHM forever, maybe after 2 more kids, I'll go back to work. And of course I may have to back to Grad school just so I have a better chance at competing with the college braniacs. =)
Mrs O, thank you for your comment and honestly, I feel the same way. I know that I want to be with my kids but I always have this fear that I might lose on career opportunities and may not be able to go back to work after a long break. This decision would probably be easier to make if I have family members here to help me ... *sigh*
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